Yoga Hurts...

I mean like I can’t move my torso type hurts. Which is weird cause you're just standing there. Literally. That’s it. Just stand there, bending and breathing. Sadly in the midst of all that bending and breathing I was led to one of two conclusions: My eight months away from the gym has left me as shapely and firm as a week old pear or the soft lighting and Enya-like background music induced a panic attack which caused me to shake and sweat uncontrollably. I’m not sure which I’m planning on claiming yet, but I’ll give you an update after day two. Also I’m planning a lawsuit against Wii. Here I was, believing I was some sort of supreme yoga master because I learned it from WiiFit. Come to find out I know nothing. And when Aimee, my new yoga guide, busted out some prayer about a light in me and light in you I was thoroughly confused. Steve from Wiifit never led me in a verse of “This Little Light of Mine” at the end of tree pose level 1. I’m just saying is all…